A priest, a minister, and a rabbi were arguing over who was the best at converting people to religion.
Finally, they decided there was only one way to settle it:
Each man would go deep into the woods, find a wild bear, and try to convert it.
A week later, they met up to share their results.
The priest arrived first.
He was covered in scratches, his clothes were torn, and he had a large bandage wrapped around his arm.
The minister stared at him.
“What happened?”
The priest sighed.
“I found the biggest bear I’ve ever seen. I started reading Scripture to him and tried to explain the teachings of my faith.”
“And?”
“He wasn’t interested.”
“What did you do?”
“I kept going.”
The priest pointed to his injuries.
“The bear chased me up a tree.”
The minister nodded sympathetically.
“That’s rough.”
The priest smiled.
“But I didn’t give up. I came back the next day with food, talked to him for hours, and finally…”
He raised his hands dramatically.
“HE CONVERTED!”
The minister and rabbi applauded.
Then the minister stepped forward.
He was even more battered.
One eye was swollen shut, his shirt was ripped, and he had a walking stick.
The priest asked,
“What happened to you?”
The minister sighed.
“I found an enormous bear too.”
“And?”
“I preached to him. I sang hymns. I told him about forgiveness and salvation.”
“Did it work?”
The minister smiled proudly.
“Eventually.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
“How?”
The minister pointed toward the forest.
“He’s at church every Sunday.”
The priest nodded respectfully.
Then both men turned toward the rabbi.
The rabbi hadn’t said a word.
He was sitting quietly on a log with both arms in casts, one leg wrapped in bandages, and a hospital bracelet still around his wrist.
The priest stared at him.
“Rabbi… what happened?”
The rabbi looked at them.
“I found my bear.”
“And?”
“I tried to explain Judaism to him.”
The priest leaned forward.
“Did he convert?”
The rabbi shook his head.
“No.”
The minister frowned.
“Then what happened?”
The rabbi sighed.
“He attacked me.”
The priest nodded.
“Same thing happened to me.”
The rabbi continued,
“I ran.”
“Understandable.”
“I climbed a tree.”
“Good idea.”
“I fell out of the tree.”
“Ouch.”
“I broke my leg.”
The priest winced.
“And then?”
The rabbi looked at them very seriously.
“Then I ended up in the hospital.”
The priest asked,
“But did you at least accomplish anything?”
The rabbi smiled.
“Actually, yes.”
The other two leaned closer.
“What?”
The rabbi pointed toward the forest.
“I don’t know about the bear…”
He paused.
“But I’m pretty sure I converted three doctors, two nurses, and the guy in the next hospital bed.”
The priest and minister stared at him.
The rabbi shrugged.
“Different bear. Different strategy.”
And that’s when the three men realized:
You don’t always win an argument by changing the other person’s beliefs. Sometimes you just need to survive long enough to tell the story. 😂
